Monday, December 3, 2012

Destroying the Cliche

Since my wife really likes sit-coms, I've probably ended up watching more than my fair share. My problem with most sit-coms is that they are mostly constructed on cliches. It's easier that way for the writers and the viewers. (Frankly, the same applies to most commercials as well). The problem is that people begin to believe the cliches.

The most irritating to me is the "men are stupid/uncaring/unthinking/(fill-in-the-blank)." Whole series have been devoted to this theme. I would suggest that this is the theory that underlies most modern feminist thinking. But is it true? Apparently not. Some examples:
 --When dating, men are as much or more interested in a relationship than women. (See also here--warning: photos NSFW).
--Men tend to look women in the face; women actually spend more time looking at other women's breasts.
These misconceptions and stereotypes are harmful. As Suzanne Venker has noted:
[Women have] been raised to think of men as the enemy. Armed with this new attitude, women pushed men off their pedestal (women had their own pedestal, but feminists convinced them otherwise) and climbed up to take what they were taught to believe was rightfully theirs.
She adds:
 But what if the dearth of good men, and ongoing battle of the sexes, is – hold on to your seats – women’s fault?
You’ll never hear that in the media. All the articles and books (and television programs, for that matter) put women front and center, while men and children sit in the back seat. But after decades of browbeating the American male, men are tired. Tired of being told there’s something fundamentally wrong with them. Tired of being told that if women aren’t happy, it’s men’s fault.
Contrary to what feminists like Hanna Rosin, author of The End of Men, say, the so-called rise of women has not threatened men. It has pissed them off. It has also undermined their ability to become self-sufficient in the hopes of someday supporting a family. Men want to love women, not compete with them. They want to provide for and protect their families – it’s in their DNA. But modern women won’t let them.
It’s all so unfortunate – for women, not men. Feminism serves men very well: they can have sex at hello and even live with their girlfriends with no responsibilities whatsoever.
It’s the women who lose. Not only are they saddled with the consequences of sex, by dismissing male nature they’re forever seeking a balanced life. The fact is, women need men’s linear career goals – they need men to pick up the slack at the office – in order to live the balanced life they seek.
So if men today are slackers, and if they’re retreating from marriage en masse, women should look in the mirror and ask themselves what role they’ve played to bring about this transformation.

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